6 Weeks Pregnant: And starting to feel it

I’m currently 15 weeks pregnant, but this is the post I wrote when I was 6 weeks pregnant. I am no longer with SD, but I wanted to share the whole of my pregnancy journey, so I have left it as written at the time and you can follow my story…

I’m now 6 weeks pregnant and I’m starting to FEEL pregnant. The lethargy and the nausea have really kicked in. I am just SO TIRED. The hormones are kicking in too and me and SD have switched to some indecisive stage where we both want to make the other one happy, but we aren’t sure how much of a risk we are taking by keeping this baby. Is it going to kill me? Is he ready to be a dad? I do really want to keep this baby but doubts are starting to creep in for him and that upsets me because my hormones are crazily out of control at the moment. We are spending a lot of time together though, despite his indecision. He has met the twins and they seem to like him. That’s extremely important to me – I couldn’t date someone my children don’t like.

SD has told his cousin and one of his friends about the baby, because he “just needed to talk it over with someone”. I guess I can understand that, but I’d have preferred he had only told his cousin or perhaps his cousin and his nan (who he lives with). It’s still very early days  and I’ve miscarried at 6 weeks pregnant before; I really hope I don’t this time. His friends are very young and not very mature (a lot of them are only 18 or 19) and I feel this should really be something he discusses with me, rather than a teenage girl. I don’t see that somebody with very little life experience and no children, who is well and truly living a student lifestyle, is going to be able to give him very meaningful advice on becoming a parent. However, it’s his decision and if he needs to talk to someone, I respect that.